And Why I Prefer House Arrest

Being a mom to a newborn and a preschooler is tough, at least for me. Maybe all moms may feel like I do, given the situation, but I swear it felt like today was one of those days where I must be the only mom battling it out.

My preschooler used to go to daycare full-time, but since being home for maternity leave, I have him with me 24/7. So now I have two at home. It was easier the first time around. It was just me and The Kid and we could, and did, go anywhere we pleased, regardless of the weather. I think I even went across the border on our own. Anyways, this time around, I'm not that lucky. I actually can't be bothered! I've got a preschooler, who, thank God, was recently potty-trained. This means that I need to know where every toilet is, and not only that, it has to be clean (I'll take spotless, please!). Here, I'm already limiting myself. Eliminating parks from the picture (forget port-a-potties!), drastically reduces our fun time. If I can do without peeing by a tree, I will, so parks are out most of the time.

So, the sad life I lead, I stay at home most days, biding my time either feeding them, wiping them, cleaning up after them, and, should I be so selfish, spending some time on my computer. I bitch, complain, that I don't get to do anything but stay home and watch the kids, but only because my house arrest is self-imposed.

Well, today, I thought I should get out of the house. With the 1st of June fast approaching, the date the US Border requirement for all persons crossing to possess a valid Canadian passport takes affect, I realize that the Little One doesn't have his passport yet. The application was filled out a month ago, the photos taken shortly afterwards, so all I need to do is go down to the office and apply. And given the wonderful weather we've been having lately, I guess it should be my duty to go out and enjoy what, hopefully, could be the start of our late Spring.

I evidently also promised The Big Kid that we'd actually go to the park too. Woo hoo! [insert sarcasm here]

The application process at the government office went quite smoothly: we waited in one queue for 3 minutes and another queue for 5 minutes. Painless.

Then I thought we could go home. Nope, he remembered what I promised (they always do) and he insisted that we still go to the park. Not to be outdone by him later when he complains about being hungry and thirsty (I'm not one of those moms who knows how to pack in advance), I suggested to we go into the mall and buy some snacks.

With the Little One still asleep this whole time, we manage to make it into the store and hunt around for the grocery section at Zellers. Of course, it's all the way upstairs, so off we go to find the elevators. I'm running around quickly, grabbing some cookies, crackers, chips (healthy menu, yes, but the chips were his idea and I wasn't in the mood to fight it), and some juice that didn't say "simulated flavours" (SOMETHING has to be healthy here).

Then the crying begins.

I haven't even gotten all the items yet. The stroller awning was getting heavier with each added item; should it collapse and injure the baby within, I had to find a basket to toss things in.

Wail, wail.

Meanwhile, the Big Kid keeps dropping his bags of chips (yes, two bags...ain't gonna pass on a multiples deal!) and I swear, I wasn't going to buy crumbs, so I'm chasing him down, telling him to be careful.

Of course, there are no cashiers on the top floor, so I had to head downstairs again.

While at the cashier, arguing over the price of the scanned items (it's the principle, okay, not the money!), a growing crowd, yes, crowd of women were approaching the stroller.

- oh, he must be hungry!
- oh, he's so cute! what a darling!
- poor dear, now, now, no crying!
- is this your brother? how sweet!
- he's not stopping...oh, poor thing!

Back away from the baby! At least this is what I would've said if I wasn't vehemently arguing with a second cashier about my totalled receipt. I would've stood my ground and demanded some money refunded, but as the voices around me grew louder, the pool of sweat accumulated on my forehead and brow, my body temperature rising with each second, and I was burning up like crazy.

Just never mind! I said and grabbed my receipt, bags and the kids and busted out of there.

Out in the sun, the heat melting my makeup even more, I took a breath, closed my eyes, and gulped. What a mad house!

We went back to the car, and with our appetites getting the best of us, we cracked open the crackers, chips, cookies and juice. I nursed the Little One in the driver's seat while I recooperated from the craziness while the Big Kid was content with his Cool Ranch Doritos, sipping lukewarm apple juice. I gorged on Cracked-Black-Pepper-with-Olive-Oil Triscuits (yum..just like a chip..you should try it!).

He didn't forget about the park.

So we went there afterwards for an hour. He met some new friends, which is why we stayed so long. Hubby met us there, on his way home from work: oh, sweet surrender!

The Big Kid didn't even have to pee, even after all that juice.

I was grateful to get home....finally. I got my fill today, experienced the Outside and so I think I'll do this again....oh, next year. Lock the door, close the blinds...I'm staying home for a while.

This year is going to be a long one.

Photo credits:
Handcuffs by foxuman
Frustrated by John De Boer
(both royalty-free)